Excerpt from "Living With Joy"
				by Sanaya Roman

	(Joyous acceptance & loving self)

    "There is tremendous guilt in this society.  Many connections come
from the solar plexus, the power center, from which people try to 
persuade, convince and manipulate each other.  Loving the self means 
stepping outside of this kind of relationship.  To do so you will need
to let go of guilt.
    "If you do not play the same ball game as those around you, you may
find them feeling threatened.  They want you to think and act in certain
ways to fit their pictures, so they try to gain power over you through
guilt.  ... When you feel strong and in charge of your life you can come
from the heart.  When you feel lacking in control you may feel you must
manipulate or engage in power struggles to get what you want.  You may
think you have to make excuses for your behavior or tell white lies to
protect other people's feelings.
    "When you act this way, you are not loving to yourself; instead,
you give your subconscious a message that who you are is not enough
or acceptable to other people.  If you wish to be free, it is important
not to manipulate other people either, but to give them their freedom.
At first you may feel as if you have lost a measure of control if you
turn over to other people the right to do as they please with their
lives.  But you will create between you a whole new level of honesty
and love that could not occur without your courage and willingness
to release control.
    "You can learn to detach from the reactions of others and from 
your own emotions if they take you out of a calm, clear center.  
Loving yourself means asserting yourself with compassion.  When you
are willing to show others who you are, you open the door for them to
expose their real selves also.  Judgement stands as an obstacle to
self-love.  Every time you judge, you separate.  When you form opinions
about another person, looking at him and saying, for instance, 'this
person looks like a lazy person, or a failure, or has terrible clothes,'
you create a message to your subconscious that the world is a place 
where you had better act in certain ways if you want to be accepted.
By rejecting other people through your judgements, you have set up
a message in your own subconscious that you are only going to accept
yourself under certain conditions.  This leads to an inner dialogue
of self-criticism.  It can also bring back many negative images to
you from the outer world, for once you send out these pictures you
have created a pathway for them to come back.
    "Look at the messages you put out to other people.  Do you accept
them lovingly, without criticizing or putting them down?  Do you
smile at them?  Are you friendly, do you allow them to feel good
about themselves, or do you sit without acknowledging them?  If you
accept them, even just telepathically (that is in your own mind), you
assist them in finding their higher selves.  You will find other
people accepting you more lovingly also."